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Lose at Life, or, Win at Life?

February 11, 2016 by AverageMarriedDad 1 Comment

What does yours most resemble? What changes need to be made? You get one shot…

Lose at Life: a day in the life of

Loser at Life Machine

  • Wake up
  • Hit snooze
  • Wake up 7 minutes later
  • Hit snooze
  • Wake up 7 minutes later
  • Struggle to get out of bed, foggy head
  • Grab a cup of coffee, eat Eggo out of a toaster
  • Get ready, wear whatever wrinkled shirt and tight-ass slacks cuz it doesn’t matter
  • Drive 45 minutes to work. Listen to sports talk radio, politics radio, or Top 40 music
  • Trudge through your 8 hour workday. Do as little as you possible can and get by.
  • Drive 45 minutes home. Listen to more sports talk radio, politics radio, or the same Top 40 music as the last six weeks.
  • Grab a fast food blog bag on your way home.
  • Grab a beer or ten after snarfing down a fat-burger or ten.
  • Sit in front of the television for a solid 4 hours for the night. Make sure it’s vapid or turn-off-your-brain TV with lots of advertisements that recommends you buy more shit.
  • Buy more shit on-line. Laser Cat shirts. Beard Cream. Feel The Bern Booty Shorts . Doesn’t matter. BUY! (seriously, if you do have to buy, buy on my Amazon link somewhere on my page or on the links above. Helps me keep the lights on. And who doesn’t need a Laser Cat men’s shirt?)
  • Go to bed semi-drunk, 2 hours after your wife, so you don’t get pressured into trying for sex, or feeling rejected for sex.
  • Sleep like shit. Alcohol. Yay!

Longer term stuff:

  • Videogames. Don’t forget those. Great way to waste time!
  • Buy a nice new car every 3 years to remind your neighbors and friends that you’re not poor and are WORTHY! Or maybe you’re just insecure.
  • Save the bare minimum. You have more important stuff to pay for now. Plus, yeah… bills. Those too. But mostly stuff.
  • Kids? Yeah. Make sure you fight a lot with your spouse. Show the kids how you’re the winner in these battles, and compromising is for weaklings. Better to win than settle.
  • Hang your head a lot and be mopey. Long term trends of this mindset show your wife and kids how hard you work.

 

Win at Life: a day in the life ofwin at life

  • Wake up
  • Get coffee
  • Get to gym, lift heavy shit. Listen to metal or podcasts. Energize or learn.
  • Sauna if you can. or. and. Take a cold shower. or not. Up to you.
  • Dress to impress. Dress for the job you want.
  • Walk to work. If not, short commute is like butterfly kisses. Listen to book or language on tape. Listen to Neil deGrasse Tyson. Make yourself smarter.
  • Work hard. Be happy in the moment. Find inspiration even in dark work times.
  • Walk or smart yourself up on the drive back home.
  • Take all of 30 minutes or so, and make a healthy family meal.
  • Walk with the family. Or dog. Or play. Or hobby your ass off. Spend time with your kids.
  • Get kids to bed (about 1 hour if your kids are like mine).
  • Settle in. Write. Blog. or Read. Every day. All three help you learn.
  • Go to bed at the same time as your wife. Snuggle and find some quiet time just the two of you. Sleep naked if you can.
  • Have sex if you both want. If not, quietly connect.
  • Go to bed and sleep well. Yay!

Longer term stuff:

  • Videogames. Boring, don’t waste your time!
  • Buy a solid car every 10, or maybe 15, years to remind your neighbors and friends that you’re concerned about reliability.
  • Save the maximum,and invest until it hurts. You have to pay yourself first, then bills, then more savings if you can. Your future self will thank you!
  • Surround yourself with the best people possible. You learn so much and raise your game the longer you are with those that expand your horizons.
  • Kids? Yeah. Love the shit out of those drunk midgets. They get old too damn fast, and when young love you like no one ever will now, or ever again… so return that favor and soak it in. It’s glorious!
  • And build yourself up every day and improve. And change your actions to be happier. And maybe a happier relationship happens too. With more sex. Kids see all of that, and feel happier too when mom and dad are happy.
  • Raise your head high and revel in life. You should feel like a fucking king! Life is Great for the King!! Fuck yeah!

Fuck yeah

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Filed Under: Life Thoughts, Marriage, Parenting, Sex Tagged With: abundance, exercise. fuck yeah, how to be king, how to win, life is awesome, lose at life, loser, success, win at life

Comments

  1. Rebecca Watson - High T Marriage says

    February 12, 2016 at 7:10 am

    Sounds like the Lose at Life guy needs a shot of testosterone! lol

    It’s all about choices, isn’t it?

    Reply

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