I haven’t been posting much content recently, just been too busy. I’m in the middle of a stretch of meetings in four different states on four consecutive work days. Some posts I want to get to, but just need some time. Writing this one in a hotel tonight.
Anyways, in my personal family/kid/wife life, we are dealing with a sleeper creeper. Seven year old Loudboy will get up to go to the bathroom at night, usually between 2 and 4 AM, and then creep into our marital bed. I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned this before, and sure you all gave me good advice, but it is still a minor marital disagreement in the philosophy.
Loudboy has always been a bad sleeper, even since he was a baby. For whatever reason, he is anxious going to bed or falling asleep, wakes up, and wants to be comforted. He was a bed wetter until maybe a year ago, so that may have contributed some. And now he wakes up to go to the bathroom, which is good. An old thunderstorm white-noise CD I had helps him go to sleep now, and if I wake up while he’s sneaking in, I tuck him back in and he usually is fine. But if I don’t wake up, there he is in the morning, like Groundhog Day.
Now Holly and I disagree on the parenting approach. I think we need to take a harder stance on the creeper, to the point of locking the door (since talking to him about not coming in doesn’t seem to work). Nights I have locked the door, he knocks, I put him back to bed, and then the next night(s) he is anxious about the whole situation. He’s a more sensitive and high-strung kid than his sister. She will come in about once every 3 months with a nightmare, which I am ok with. Kid being a kid.
So we are/were somewhat hippyish parents. Did the whole cosleeping thing with the kids for most of their first year while they were infants for breastfeeding purposes. My wife (especially) and I are big on snuggling with the kids, and want them to have a loving environment to grow up in. We also both recognize these snuggly, small kid moments are fleeting, so value them a lot. But it’s a fine line to walk, and every night of a sleeper creeper is too much for me. Holly said she used to do the same thing when she was a kid, and I never did this (with parents that didn’t show that much affection), so our perspectives are very different. I don’t think either of us is wrong, and family beds are apparently pretty common in other cultures.
We still get sexy times, so this situation isn’t impacting that, just sometimes better sleep (Loudboy moves a lot in his sleep). This study found kids who sneak into bed are less likely to be fat, so at least we have that going for us. Which is nice. Personally, I think it’s just a phase, but one I don’t want lasting for too long.
This funny (and clean) song describes my life, including the mix-breed dog part: