My younger bro got his one year chip this week. A year ago, I didn’t even think he would be alive, let alone sober, losing weight and on his way to turning his life completely around. During the last few years while I was discovering the Red Pill and working on self- and marriage improvement in my life, my brother was in a downward spiral in his life and not really willing to take the life preserver until he was at rock bottom. His marriage fell apart, he lost his job, he’s lucky he wasn’t thrown in the clink for some of the stuff I heard he pulled. Eventually ending up in the hospital, twice, for issues related to failing liver and stomach issues and who knows what else. We all tried to help him as best we could, but he was depressed and essentially willing to die. I believe he was going through something like a handle (1.75 L) of bathtub gutrot vodka every couple days. For years.
After a hospital stint where they said “you’re going to die… and soon, if you don’t stop” he finally decided he wanted to live and be a dad for his three kids. It wasn’t an easy recovery, mentally or physically. He struggled with the whole “higher power” thing, but found a spiritual belief system that jibed with his logical self. He had a drain in his liver (think a maple syrup tap) that took out gross stuff. He had jaundice like a yellow baby. Totally sick on death’s door. But somehow he managed to both stay sober, persevere physically and come out the other side mentally and happier than he’s been in a long, long time.
His ex-wife, despite having her own issues (somewhat to very BSC), has actually been one of, if not the, biggest supporter of him and his recovery. She at least recognizes the importance of having a biological father play a major role in the kids lives, and while my brother has bitterness and resentment about her cheating on him and dissolving the marriage, he’s appreciative of her on-going support. Other major supporters have been my parents, my other brother and some of his friends he made while going through recovery. Having written him off as someone who didn’t want to live (and thus, I wasn’t going to mentally allow him to tax my life any more), I struggled for a long time with letting him be alive in my mind and someone who should be back in my life. Still am to some degree.
But a congratulations of making it through the first year is in order. He even used the word “Namaste” yesterday on Facebook as he was reflecting on this experience. I am hoping he continues to improve health-wise (he still has issues, and I believe is on a list to receive a liver transplant – at 35 years old) and continues to conquer his demons. It’s not easy dealing with addiction, for either those who have the monkey on their back, or their loved ones. Hopefully those who have gone through similar experiences have happier outcomes like me. For the others, my condolences.